Things I have learned:
- The buttons in the elevator in the office are always on the side away from the main door.
- Some things are worth spending a lot of time on.
- Exercise is more interesting when there are zombies involved.
- The right pair of shoes can make all the difference.
Things I wished I hadn’t learned:
- Science Diet is awful and I will never attempt to feed it to a cat again. Ever.
- Apples do not belong in chili. No matter how intriguing the recipe sounds.
- There is no way in the world that eggplant will ever be made edible.
- Slamming your foot into the corner of the dishwasher door really hurts.
- Exercise-induced asthma is really, really, really annoying. And frustrating. And did I mention annoying?
Things I wish other people would learn:
- There is no such thing as a ‘miracle’ food.
- There is no one diet that will work for everyone.
- There is no one exercise that will work for everyone.
- None of the rest of us care what you had to eat, or more importantly, how many calories were in it.
- The number on a scale is not, and has never been, the One True Definition of your health, despite what the media wants you to believe.
- Just because someone enjoys different things from you doesn’t mean that there is something wrong with them.
- Claiming that you are joking does not make it any less insulting. In fact it makes it worse.