Still Life, With Cats

How to photograph a finished knitted item, without cats:

1. Lay out your knitted item on a flat surface, preferably with a solid color sheet of cloth or paper underneath.
2. Stand on stool, or chair, so as to be able to best photograph the item from above.
3. Take the picture.

How to photograph a finished knitted item, with cats:

1. Lay out the background sheet, carefully smoothing out the surface so as to minimize any wrinkles or lumps.
2. Remove the cat who has come out of nowhere to tunnel underneath the sheet.
3. Re-smooth the sheet with one hand, while flinging a toy with the other so as to distract the cat.
4. Lay out your knitted item, smoothing it out carefully.
5. Remove the cat who has flopped on top of the knitted item because if it’s there, it *must* be a thing for cats.
6. Re-smooth the knitted item.
7. Climb up on top of a stool or chair to take the picture.
8. Climb back down to rescue the item from cat who reached up with one paw and stealthily snagged a corner of the knitted item, which is now rapidly disappearing underneath the table.
9. Try to distract cats with toys, empty boxes, packing paper.
10. Repeat steps 1 through 9 several times more.
11. Give up and take a picture that includes the cats and call it artsy.
12. Eventually manage to snap hasty shot of item once cats get bored and wander off to wreak havoc somewhere else.